Can you talk us through your rugby background – what made you take up the sport and your rugby journey?
I first started playing rugby in 2007. I moved here from England to go to university and joined Queen’s University Rugby Club. Our school didn’t offer rugby and I wasn’t very sporty then. I didn’t really enjoy sport at school that much, but when I went to uni, I thought the best place to make friends would be in a sports team. My sister had started playing rugby at Nottingham University and she had had so much fun so I thought I would sign up too. My main aim was to make friends. I had been playing at Queen’s for two seasons and we had a game against Co. Cavan, where one of the Ulster coaches had come to watch. At the end of the game, my coach said he wanted me to go along to Ulster training sessions. I was so surprised as although I loved playing rugby, I didn’t think I was very good at it!
Things got a little more serious with the rugby and so I started focusing on more gym work. Around that time, Belfast Harlequins had started a women’s team, so a number of us moved there as they were keen to try and get into the All-Ireland League. We wanted to play at that level, so we moved there where we had a couple of great seasons. Unfortunately, we got to the League final and could have moved up to the AIL if we won, but we lost, so a number of us moved to Cooke where I’ve been since 2012. I’ve been really enjoying playing with them; when I first joined, they had just been relegated the previous season and so were pushing to move back up to the AIL. It was a great high-performance atmosphere to be in, and we had an excellent coach, Grace Davitt; it was fun and challenging to be playing AIL rugby.
You’re the proud mum of a beautiful two-year-old boy – can you tell us about your pregnancy experience and how that impacted your rugby?
“Impact” is the right word as it did impact my rugby-playing! I had always wanted to have children and it can be difficult when you’re engrossed in a contact sport like rugby to decide to take a break. I had been on holidays to see my family and my cousin had just had a baby. I said to his wife, “I’d love to have a baby but it doesn’t feel like the right time”. She said, “it’s never the right time – you just have to go for it!”. She was right and I then found out I was pregnant at the beginning of 2019. I was obviously delighted but it became a bit of a shock that I wouldn’t be able to play rugby for a while. It mentally took a bit of a toll on me because I had real FOMO (Fear of Missing Out); I was trying to go to training and limit my contact. I was keen to stay active as much as possible.
At that stage, I was playing for Ulster, and I thought I was the fittest I had ever been. We had a great Strength & Conditioning programme and I wanted to keep up my strength and aerobic fitness up for as long as possible. I did keep doing some non-contact training and also coached our youth girls’ team. Unfortunately, I got injured when I was coaching the girls at a blitz at Aviva Stadium – I wasn’t going to miss that opportunity! I was refereeing while the girls were playing and took off after a player who made a break, and as I turned to run, I pulled something in my groin. At that point, I was about 30 weeks pregnant and it didn’t get better unfortunately as you get heavier and heavier. It meant I had to reduce a lot of the other activity I was doing.
At what point after having your son did you think about getting back to playing rugby and what did you do to prepare your body for that?
After I had Fiachra in 2019, I was dying to get back on the rugby pitch – so much so that when I was on the post-natal ward the day after I had my baby, I asked the physio when I could get back to playing rugby, and she laughed - I had a one-day-old baby in my arms! She said to start slowly, do some walking and to make sure I do my pelvic floor exercises.
It was a frustrating struggle and there wasn’t very much formal advice for people who were in their first ten weeks post-partum. You get told you have to have a doctor’s check before resuming sport, which again varies from person-to-person. It depends on what your birth experience is like and your recovery as well. I had been trying to gradually get back to activity and taking Fiachra for lots of walks and started jogging. About four months after he was born, I went back to training at Cooke. The first contact session we did was quite scary, and I took it very easy; I was partnered up with someone coming back from injury which helped, but there wasn’t a lot of formal support to get back to that kind of activity.
About five months post-partum, I played a match with our 2nd XV, which was great. I managed to play the full 80 minutes, which was exhausting but I really enjoyed it. A couple of weeks later, I was on the bench for our 1st XV in an All-Ireland Cup match. I was absolutely terrified; it felt like going back to play your first ever match. I was so worried about letting people down and worried that my contact ability wasn’t anywhere near it needed to be, but everyone was so supportive and encouraging. I played about 20 minutes but it felt like a lot at AIL level!
That was in February 2020 and everything stopped again \[due to COVID\]! It probably benefited me hugely because it meant I had to take a break from playing and training. At that time, the pelvic injury I sustained when I was pregnant hadn’t really fully gone away, so being forced to do circuits in my living room probably really helped me in the long-run.
During lockdown, I bought a set of weights to use in my back garden; I was really lucky I could do that. It helped me massively because the gyms were all closed and there’s only so much you can do in the living room. The club S&C coach led Tabata training twice a week on Zoom, which was fantastic for aerobic fitness. The strength training was so important too. I was working with an S&C coach to put together a programme for me and build my strength. Leading into the Inter-Pros last year, I was much stronger and had that time to focus on my strength training which was completely necessary. I’m really glad I did it.
What challenges have you experienced as a mother playing rugby?
The frustrating thing about my pregnancy and keeping active was that there was so little information for women who want to stay active, particularly in the first trimester. Sports coaches and personal trainers are probably really anxious about giving advice to women in the first trimester. There’s maybe not a lot of research or it might be an ethical issue to do research with women who are 12 weeks pregnant. The advice is just “be careful”, which is terrible as it’s so open to interpretation. I wonder if I had better advice if I had been able to better manage my activity levels during pregnancy.
How have your team-mates and coaches supported you as a mum?
My coach, Daniel \[Allen\] was so patient. He was always asking how I was doing but there was no pressure on me to come back. When I came back to training initially, there was no expectation to do everything. I was given time to get back in mentally and physically. In terms of my team-mates, they were amazing and so supportive. They totally understand when you have a little one, you might be late for training sometimes or your head might not be there. I remember one night in particular, the first time Fiachra was aware that I was leaving and had some separation anxiety. I was leaving for training and he was screaming the place down. My husband told me to “just go!”. I got to training and Beth Cregan asked me if I was ok and I burst into tears! She told me I was in the best place and my husband was looking after him, that I needed space to train and get away for a bit. She was so right. It's those sorts of things that really helped support me.
What would help support mothers to manage pregnancy, parenting and playing sport?
It varies from person-to-person, I think. I’ve been really lucky through running my Instagram page, “Mama Loves Sport” I get to hear from women from around the world who have gone back to sport after having children. The challenges vary and the support that is needed varies as well. Generally, you hear a lot of people say they didn’t know what they could and couldn’t do while pregnant, or they tried to continue training and got injured. Once they’ve had their child, the difficulties are more about ‘mum guilt’ about leaving your child and balancing time.
People also talk about the challenge of feeling mentally and physically ready to go back to sport. I think more formal support and guidance for anyone who has had a child about the exercise you can do post-partum and building your fitness back up. Before giving birth, advice on keeping active would be useful too. Practical advice is great too. Ulster’s S&C coach, Diesel \[Paul Heasley\] advised me that I could train at the gym but should avoid explosive movements like cleans where the bar might hit your stomach. You might not think about things like that if you didn’t get that advice. World Rugby’s advice is that you should stop all activity when you find out that you’re pregnant – that rules you out for a very long time. If there was more guidance and support on what you CAN do to keep active, that would be amazing.
What do you love most about being a mum who plays rugby?
The time away from my child! That is probably the most selfish answer ever, but it’s so important. I cannot be a good parent unless I have head space. It means I come back home to Fiachra after training or a game more relaxed – even if we have lost – and I’ve missed him. It’s just a break from being a parent – it’s so important. When I play rugby, all I focus on is rugby. I forget about everything I’m worried about, and that head space is really important for parents to have. I believe that’s the best thing. I’m sure a nicer answer would be to say I’m making my child proud, but no, it’s that I get to be away from him for a bit!
